I was recently thinking to myself, do I get paid to visit? Sometimes people ask me this question. The answer is no, not technically. But I believe that aging adults in this country are dying of loneliness, and that holds great weight with me.
The other day, I was talking to a client and he was reminiscing about his mom and his baby sister. He was talking to me about how his baby sister, her hand fit around his pinky, and he would just lead her around and she would follow him. This is an 88-year-old man still calling his sister, his baby sister. Moments like this take me back to the core of who they are. So when I’m visiting with people, it’s not just visiting, it’s finding out who they are, what’s important to them, why they did this, why they did that. It gives me glimpses into these people’s world, who they used to be, how who they are now was formed.
It helps me guide them when tough healthcare decisions come up. It helps me advocate for them when things aren’t going their way.
And it’s all because I took the time to just visit. It offers me as the person with them, a gift. It reminds me that I am currently living the moments that they’re reminiscing about. My sister is still alive. My kids are young. Recently it was Christmas. These are things that I’m living that they’re reminiscing about.
There’s a certain pause and honor that I appreciate when I’m hanging out with them, and what an absolute gift it is to listen to who they are and allow that to guide their healthcare. I recently had a client who apologized to me because the entire time was spent just talking and I had to tell on myself.
I had to say, when I was a little girl, I went to the nursing home and I would just sit there and listen to people’s stories. I didn’t know about healthcare. I didn’t even know they could have been confused for all I knew. But I loved it.
When I was deciding what I wanted to do when I was in gerontology school, I thought to myself, wow, wouldn’t it be cool if I could get paid to visit older adults to be the person that helps meet that need of loneliness? I told him, that’s what I do.
-Janie
